Learning to love both myself and others again is the new challenge in my life. I feel like through the divorce I crashed and just shut down all my emotions to pretty much everyone. It's like my body/heart/soul went into self-preservation mode naturally and I forgot to feel. There have been ups and downs and times that I've really struggled. There have also been times that I've laughed until I cried and smiled so much it hurt my face.
It's hard not to take all the negative feelings and put them on everyone who walks into my life. Some of my closest friends have had to endure my coldness and stand-off behavior. And for that I am sorry.
A new face has come into my life. He came out of seemingly nowhere and for the first time in a long while, I have a heartbeat. Learning to love and allow myself to be loved seem to be the hardest part - and luckily for me, he's willing to fight.
